It's amazing how the human mind works. One minute one can be head over heels in love with you, and the next, so determined to cut off all contacts.
Yeap, I'm back to singlehood.
We went on a holiday to Krabi not long ago. I thought we were all doing well. Apparently, breaking up had been on his mind for some time. And he didn't even try to want to give another chance. No chance means no chance. He had no trust in me and that was the last reason I expected. A relationship cannot last without trust in your partner. I believed I had made many mistakes but none too serious for a break up (eg. cheating) although I believed being with me is never ever smooth sailing. It's always a roller-coaster being with me. You can either take it as challenging and exciting, or emotionally draining and constantly afraid.
Initally, being friends was still possible. But he suddenly felt it was best if we totally cut off contacts. Well, different people have different ways of handling situations and this was probably his best way of moving on. What I can do now is to learn from my mistakes and be a better person. As he said, I am a strong girl. And I am indeed. Something that doesn't kills me only makes me stronger.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast.
Although he is determined to cut off all contacts so he can move on, I will not blame him for that. Still, if we ever bump into each other, I hope we won't act like total strangers. I will still treat this journey as a good memory to be buried in a faraway spot. I wish him all the best and I thank him for everything.
P.S. I hope you will be loved by a more suitable girl. Do not be afraid to hurt or be hurt. Being in a relationship is not only about giving and compromising but it's also about taking and sharing your problems. Do not be afraid to share them as you'll never know whether she'll truly be there for you in times of need. Do not keep things inside your heart and do not be afraid to get angry. I know there's no free lunch in this world. I will definitely learn to say 'NO'. =)
